---
title: "Disarming with selective honesty and generosity"
description: "How Greene says to lower someone's guard before you act."
canonical: https://tomsharman.com/bookshelf/48-laws-of-power/disarming-with-selective-honesty-and-generosity/
updated: 2026-11-03
---

# Disarming with selective honesty and generosity

> How Greene says to lower someone's guard before you act.

Robert Greene's framework, from 48 Laws of Power, pp. 146 to 153.

Framework 7 of 27 from [48 Laws of Power](https://tomsharman.com/bookshelf/48-laws-of-power/index.md) by Robert Greene. Category: Offers and pricing.

## The steps

1. **Make the gesture early.** Use selective honesty on the first encounter so the impression sticks.
2. **Build a reputation through small acts.** Show honesty across a series of inconsequential acts.
3. **Give before you take.** Offer a gift, favour or kind act that softens the ground or distracts.
4. **Make it sincere.** Only use the tactic if the gesture seems heartfelt, because exposure turns warmth into hatred.

## Where it comes from

From chapter: LAW 12, pp. 146–153

One sincere act of honesty or generosity covers dozens of dishonest ones. Count Lustig walked away from Al Capone with $5,000 by returning the $50,000 he had been given to double, and Jay Gould lost millions to Lord Gordon-Gordon after an initial show of help. Greene calls this giving before you take: a gift, such as the Trojan horse, or a kindness like Camillus returning the Faliscan hostages, lowers defences and distracts. It works best on first encounters and as a reputation built from small acts, but it fails if people see through it. The reversal is that once you are known as deceitful, playing the rogue works better.

## The animation

24 seconds, 4:5, no sound.

- MP4: https://tomsharman-downloads-006143767029.s3.eu-north-1.amazonaws.com/downloads/bookshelf/48-laws-of-power/disarming-with-selective-honesty-and-generosity.mp4
- MP4, dark: https://tomsharman-downloads-006143767029.s3.eu-north-1.amazonaws.com/downloads/bookshelf/48-laws-of-power/disarming-with-selective-honesty-and-generosity-dark.mp4
- Still: https://tomsharman-downloads-006143767029.s3.eu-north-1.amazonaws.com/downloads/bookshelf/48-laws-of-power/disarming-with-selective-honesty-and-generosity.png
- Still, dark: https://tomsharman-downloads-006143767029.s3.eu-north-1.amazonaws.com/downloads/bookshelf/48-laws-of-power/disarming-with-selective-honesty-and-generosity-dark.png